"I Wanna Boyfriend!"
by Mr. Miagi's Banana Factory
Summary: Aoshi wants a boyfriend and plans to choose from either Kenshin or Sano. (This was made because of the people who reviewed


#Yah, Mr. Miagi's Banana Factory owns nothing. If you were one of those people who reviewed "Things Aoshi Would Never Say" by us and commented on either how Aoshi sounded gay or that we don't like Kaoru (you are correct, by the way) then you ARE responsible for the thought that went into this fic. Enjoy! ^_____^

*Aoshi at Aoiya*

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Aoshi: *sigh* I want a boyfriend so badly…

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Okina: What did you just mutter to yourself?

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Aoshi: Nothing.

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Okina: Oh, okay. Just so you know, the Kenshin-gumi are coming to visit us today.

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Aoshi: Okay.

*Aoshi in pondernment (I just made a new word! ^_^)*

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Aoshi: *thinking to self* _Now who should I go for, Sano or Kenshin?_

(A/N: If you think that Aoshi is much to queer for his own good at this moment in time, I'll just have you know that you should take the gayness, multiply it by ten and then add three. Then you'll have an idea of how bad this is probably gonna get *smiles maliciously* Continue!)

*the Kenshin-gumi arrive*

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Kaoru: Hi y'all!

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Okina: Eek! What the hell is that horrid, ugly savage?!

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Misao: Don't worry, Okina, it's only Kaoru. *whispering to Okina* I wouldn't touch her though, her ugliness might be contagious! 

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Kenshin: It's nice to see you all again.

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Sano: Do you have food? I'm hungry. Give me food now.

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Aoshi: Kenshin, Sano, I need to talk with you privately for a moment.

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Yahiko: What about me?! I'm a man too, ya know!

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Aoshi: *thinking to self* _Hmm… I didn't even think of trying to take the role of a homosexual pedophile… I might just try that later. Who knows, the little bugger might be nice for a foursome…_

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Misao: Could I show them their rooms first, Lord Aoshi? Please?!

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Aoshi: Fine. *thinking to self* _Going to them one at a time may be better anyway._

*Misao shows them their rooms*

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Kaoru: Okay, you've shown all of the guys their room so… where do I sleep?

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Misao: In the broom closet.

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Kaoru: WHAT?!

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Misao: Well… you won't be able to spread that disease so easily from in there.

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Kaoru: What disease?

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Misao: *sweat drop* Oh.. Uh.. The one that's being spread all over Kyoto! I figured you wouldn't want to catch it so…. Erm… we set you up with the uncontaminated broom closet!

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Kaoru: *touched* Gee, that was so thoughtful!

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Misao: Yep!

*Kenshin unpacking in his room*

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Aoshi: *outside* Kenshin, may I talk to you?

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Kenshin: Sure, that you can! Come on in.

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Aoshi: *walks in and shuts door* Kenshin, I have a confession to make.

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Kenshin: Well, I wouldn't mind hearing what you have to say, indeed I would not.

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Aoshi: *grabs Kenshin by shoulders* Kenshin I am madly in love with you! *gets on knees* Will you marry me?

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Kenshin: *awestruck* But Aoshi, this is so… sudden!

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Aoshi: Ya I know but I'm desperate!

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Kenshin: But Aoshi… I'm straight.

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Aoshi: Then why the hell are you going out with Kaoru?!

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Kenshin:…. Because I'm desperate….

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Aoshi: I knew we were meant for each other!

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Kenshin: Fine then. Aoshi, I will marry you.

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Aoshi: Oh good. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go propose to Sano real fast and see what he answers, k. *leaves*

*Sano's in his room looking at porn magazine*

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Aoshi: *walks into room* Sano, I need to tell you something.

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Sano: Ya, okay.

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Aoshi: I'm deeply in love with you!

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Sano: *puts down porno* What?!

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Aoshi: I had to confess my feeling and I now need to know if you'll marry me.

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Sano: *happy* Yay! I don't have to be a single bastard anymore! Okay!

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Aoshi: Okay, now I just need to decide who I want more, you or Kenshin…

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Kenshin: *walks in room* You're cheating on me already!! With SANO???!!!!!

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Sano: Yep! This is getting kinkier by the moment, neh?

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Aoshi: Yah, Kenshin, I don't know which of you I should choose… Can I take both?

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Sano: Hey! We can be one big kinky family!

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Kenshin: …. Oh, what the hell.

*Kaoru in broom closet*

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Kaoru: It sure is cramped in here… Oh is that a spider on the wall? Hi little spider! *extends hand toward spider*

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Spider: *runs away in fear*

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Kaoru: Poor little thing. Probably afraid of the dark.

*the spider gets all of its buddies together to attack the ugly cow (aka: Kaoru)*

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Kaoru: Oh, you've brought your friends!

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Army of Black Widows: *attacks Kaoru*

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Kaoru: *dies*

*Okina performing matrimonial service*

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Okina: And do you, Aoshi, take Sano and Kenshin to be your husbands?

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Aoshi: I indiddly do!

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Okina: And do you, Kenshin and Sano, take Aoshi to be your husband?

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Kenshin: Ya.

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Sano: Uh huh.

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Okina: Okay, I now pronounce you husband and husbands. You may kiss the husbands.

*So Aoshi married Sano and Kenshin and lived happily ever after*


End file.
